February 12, 2007
Let it be said that I can't let go of shit.
After this year's woefully boring State of the Union speech, Jim Webb fired back with his own response that left Bush stuttering in the dust. Kinda like what he'd be doing if he weren't in office. Some people loved it. Some people laughed. But the one response that kinda stuck in my craw came from Jonathan Alter. Now, I like most of what Alter has to say, but this line grabbed me by the short-and-curlies.
"Virginia Sen. James Webb, in office only three weeks, managed to convey a muscular liberalism--with personal touches--that left President Bush's ordinary address in the dust."
Okay, so it looks like I stole that last part from Alter. But nevermind that.
Muscular liberalism.
I know that the gang of folks we've had representing the liberal side of the universe for the U.S. government hasn't been the most hard-lined crew (fucking Political Correctness? Eat a dick. Way to make us look like a bunch of whiny crackers plagued with guilt, guys. Oops...make that `a bunch of whiny European-Americans, etc.etc.'.), but to imply that Webb single-handedly resurrected "muscular liberalism" is to do a disservice to those of us who realize that there's still a fair amount of pussies left on our side of the fence.
However, it also does a disservice to those of us who have had to sit back and endure years of being belittled as soft and weak by an opposing force of old, fat, rich white guys and doughy brainless hicks. Such a statement completely overlooks the fact that the right employs a steady stream of machismo bullshit that, if actually put into motion and governed by principles and rationale, would make Charles Bronson and Clint Eastwood look like momma's boys who wore their sisters' undergarments.
The only reason that their rhetoric has led them nowhere?
No balls. No willingness to sacrifice. No willingness to stand up to corruption and hatred. In fact, these assholes encouraged corruption and hatred while all the while pounding their chests and yelling that if you DIDN'T support said corruption and hatred, why you were a limp-wristed, tree-hugging pinko commie nancy-boy faggot who loved terrorists and hated America.
The idiots latched onto it like it was a supermodel's tit loaded with mother's milk, and drank themselves into complacency. Suddenly it was okay for the government to shit all over our rights and grow so huge that it wouldn't even fit into Britney Spears's hoo-ha. They didn't care if they were going broke and getting royally screwed due to lack of healthcare insurance and the exploitation of minimum wage, because the brown people weren't attacking, and that was what mattered. As long as the shining beacons of good Christian morality kept gays from marrying, let them cute little brain-dead blind girls live, and sold our country's well-being to Halliburton and Blackwater to keep the dirty ol' crazy Muslims away, all was well. Nevermind the fact that these corrupt fucks ruled by fear and capitalized off of making the same hard-ass salt of the earth men and wimmenfolk that voted for them pee their pants...they were rough-and-tumble rich white guys who juked and jived their way through military deferments in ways that would make Bob Hayes' head spin.
And they fiddled while America burned.
It's strange how Republicans have had to constantly display macho bullshit to keep people enthralled. They figured as long as they kept their dicks swinging, the American people wouldn't notice how shriveled and laughably tiny they were. And with one speech, one of the weiner-party residents brushed all their bullshit aside and left the boy-king of bad 80's action flick one-liners in the back, sucking fumes.
It's about fucking time.
Posted by Jake at February 12, 2007 08:52 PM
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